Saturday, November 17, 2007

Irish Fruitcake Recipe

Seems a number of people are searching for the famous Irish fruitcake recipe now that the huge holiday insanity season is approaching. I know you are out there as I get three or four hits a day on my Sitemeter.

I found this recipe for Irish fruitcake years ago and have since seen a number of variations, including the Jack Daniels version.

Fruitcakes have become outrageously expensive to make at home so if you are on a budget and won't be baking this year, just read the recipe while sipping a beer!

Irish Fruitcake
1 cup water
1 cup sugar
4 large eggs
2 cups dried fruit
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup brown sugar
lemon juice
nuts
1 gallon Irish whiskey

Sample the whiskey to check for quality.

Take a large bowl.

Check the whiskey again to be sure it is of the highest quality.
Pour one level cup and drink.
Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl.

Add 1 teaspoon sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whiskey is still OK.
Cry another tup.

Turn off mixer.

Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt.
Or something.
Who cares?

Check the whiskey.

Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something.
Whatever you can find.

Grease the oven.

Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Throw the bowl out of the window.

Check the whiskey again.

Go to bed.

Who the hell likes fruitcake anyway?

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P.S. Do you have a favorite or old family fruitcake recipe or joke about fruitcake to share? I would love to add it to my collection! See my profile for my email address.
P.S. Again -- You might want to visit my December 2006 post "Fruitcake."

© Copyright 2007 Suzzwords

9 comments:

  1. p.mona7:27 PM

    Now, this is my kind of fruitcake. I love fruitcake.

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  2. I'm not that fond of fruitcake; but I don't think it matters with your recipe. I can think of several people who would LOVE it.

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  3. Great recipe. I shall be sharing it with lots of people and make a large batch for myself.

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  4. During WW2 my brother was overseas with the US army. My Mother baked him a fruitcake and sent it to him packed in a Spam can. He tells the story that he took one look at the Spam can and gave it away to a guy in his company not knowing it was a cake.
    :)
    My Mother was not a great baker but she made the BEST fruitcake ever so it was his loss.

    I love a good fruitcake with lots of pecans.

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  5. I think I like your fruitcake recipe -- maybe I can whip up a couple to share with neighbors.

    I usually get a raised eyebrow when I tell people I like fruitcake -- but only if the cake is a light cake (not that heavy dark type.) Actually, there's very little cake in the mix of candied fruits, pecans, and I don't know what all else, but definitely no citron.

    A company in Texas used to make a perfect one, but the company was sold many years ago and the cake now is a "mere shadow of it's former self."

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  6. loveM2:31 PM

    I don't care for fruit cake but I do like the main ingredient in your recipe. Thanks for the laugh.

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  7. I've had that recipe for years, Suzz!!! It does make the Season bright although I favor Kay's infamous eggnog or glogg -- not quite as lethal but. Stop by tomorrow for a cuppa! lol

    Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year!

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  8. someday very soon I will make this! It sounds amazing

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