Things Our Parents Said – Part 2

Chew nails and spit tacks.

Dumber than a doorknob.

Scarcer than hen’s teeth.

Older than dirt.

In a tizzy.

Nutty as a fruitcake.

Screw loose.

Lights are on, but no one is home.

Up shit creek without a paddle.

Running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off.

Like a bat out of hell.

Meaner than a snake.

Can’s see the forest for the trees.

Up one side and down the other.

Straight as the crow flies.

Solid as a rock.

Weak as water.

Spends money like it is going out of style.

Can’t fight his way out of a paper bag.

Ants in his pants.

Run around your thumb to get to your fingers.

Three sheets to the wind.

Tight as a tick.

Preaching to the choir.

Silly as a goose.

Loose as a goose.

Your word is your bond.

Sealed with a handshake.

Now here’s a little something from a good friend.

“My grandfather taught me the this over 50 years ago and I haven't been able to find where it originated or what it means. Any ideas?

‘As I was walking out in the street on the third day of last Julember with my shonebone in my pocket and my knees under my arms, I saw a white blackbird picking up grapeshot out of the wall. I picked up a rock and threw it at the white blackbird and killed a dead dog. Five furlongs on the other side of nowhere, a dead possum bit the hatchet's head off. You think that's simple but it isn't half as simple as Doctor Doolittle's blister-plaster falling out of his pocket and blistering his old horse's back, five feet or five feet square, whichever you want to call it.’”

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