Sunday, January 18, 2009

Unscientific Reasons Why M&Ms Are Good for You

“Watson, come here. I need you.”

“Ah, there you are. For today’s scientific analysis, we are going to examine M&Ms for their visual nutritional value.”

“Here, you take a handful of the green and blue M&Ms and I’ll take the yellow, orange and red.”

“Our experiment is to determine if the outer candy shell that protects the tasty inner chocolate has any relationship to actual healthy foods.”

“Watson, you go first. Taste a blue one.”

“What?! You ate ALL the blue ones already?! Okay, okay. What is your analysis?”

“Ah, so you believe the blue M&Ms are a visual reference to blueberries which we all know are high in antioxidants."

“Humm, interesting."

"Now I will taste the red, orange and yellow ... uumm, munch, munch ... M&Ms individually.”

“Maybe a handful would be better.”

“Ummm, why yes, Watson, they DO melt in my mouth.”

“Oh, right, back to the subject. Well, um, ah, let’s see. The red ones, now that could possibly remind us of cherries, and of course, the orange (By the way, what rhymes with “orange?”) and yellow ones make us think of citrus fruits. Conclusion, cherries and citrus are wholesome and nutritious.”

“Your turn again. What is your analysis of the green?”

“Brilliant, Watson! The connection between the green M&Ms to grass that is eaten by cows to produce milk which is a good source of calcium is now apparent.”

“All righty now, our experiment is complete for today. What shall we do with the remaining pound of M&Ms in this large bag?”

“Excellent suggestion, Watson. I say we get right to it.”

© Copyright 2009 Suzzwords

P.S. Check out what Wikipedia has to say about the nutritional value of chocolate.

6 comments:

  1. Who cares about nutrition! Chocolate of any stripe is soul food!!!! It's therapeutic!!!


    Just my take!

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  2. Anonymous1:01 PM

    In my younger years I was slim and trim. My approach to eating M&M's was to only eat the green ones and leave the rest for others. Now I eat all colors without a hint of guilt. VIVA LA CHOCOLAT!!!!

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  3. Anonymous9:56 AM

    And of course we all know chocolate comes from the cocoa bean which has to make it a vegetable. Thanks for the colorful analysis!

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  4. Yes, I've long been a part of the M&M research study program....and am still involved in it. It's quite extensive. They are constantly coming out with new 'improved' products you know. I'm proud to say I've been on the ground floor of most of the research and experimentation of this testing and shall do my best to continue to do so. This of course has come at a slightly personal cost to me in a couple of ways; but I've always felt....I've had to 'do what I've had to do.' ~Joy

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  5. Most interesting experiment. I wonder if they need any volunteers?

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  6. Well said! I decided to join the experiment, but then found I only had chocolate frogs (freddos) and they were all the same colour, so I have nothing to report except that they ALL tasted the same, and I do feel thoroughly nourished..

    Thank you for the incentive to take part..

    :-)
    Della

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