Saturday, June 21, 2008

Variations on a Parental Admonition

Close the door.

CLOSE THAT DOOR!

Do I have to tell you again to CLOSE THE DOOR!

Were you born in a barn? CLOSE THE DOOR!

If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times to SHUT THE DOOR!

Inside or outside, make up your mind, but either way, CLOSE THE DOOR!

I’m not paying to air condition all of the outdoors, now CLOSE THAT DOOR!

You left the front door open AGAIN, now go CLOSE THE DOOR!

If you forget to SHUT THAT DOOR one more time, you are grounded for a week, Mister!

Where are these flies coming from? Don’t tell me you left the back door open again!

You just wait until your father comes home. He’ll show you how to CLOSE THE DOOR!

SHUT IT! SHUT IT! How many times do I have to tell you?

Not slam it, dammit, just CLOSE THE DOOR!

This house does not have automatic door closers! SHUT THE DOOR!

One more time, just one more time, and that’s it!

© Copyright 2008 Suzzwords

3 comments:

  1. You must have remembered to shut the kitchen door??!! I think I heard the clatter of glass.

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  2. Anonymous5:36 PM

    Yep,I heard em all and now I find myself using a few of those lines on my ............nope, not kids..........hubby!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I guess I said them all when my children were small. They will remember I am sure.

    I don't think I could have compiled this list, though, if I tried. Good job.

    ReplyDelete