Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Elevator Mania

If you want to have some fun, just stand back and watch people trying to get on and off crowded elevators. There is something about elevator doors opening on the ground floor that sucks those waiting directly to the entrance so that those trying to get off have to bob and weave their way through the eager beavers.

There must be some sort of electronic connection between the elevator and the human brain – doors open, brain disconnects. Normal men and women suddenly go numb to the fact that the people inside must first come OUT before they can get IN.

Have you ever seen someone actually swept backwards and imprisoned by the eager beavers in their zest to be the first on? Some of those “first ons” are only riding up one floor and then have to squeeze their way past the fifth and eleventh floor folks.

Could it be that every time an elevator reaches the ground floor and doors open, a new prize of some sort appears on the back wall and the first one in wins? It must be a great prize from the way people lunge through the doors. Or maybe the rule is first one on gets to push all the buttons for everyone else. It’s a control thing.

The weird part about this elevator mania is that the same people who go up will also later come down and have to dodge and weave their way through forward-pressing bodies to escape. Apparently that experience has no effect on their next "up" elevator ride as they leap forward to gain their favorite spot – back wall, left or right wall, right in front.

Maybe the mad dash is because no one likes to stand in the middle; there is no where to lean or a rail to grasp. “Middle” people also have to bump right or left letting the wall people out. Have you also noticed that when an elevator is comfortably filled, there’s always at least one more person who has to push and wedge their way in to create the sardine effect?

Personally, I’ll just stand back and wait for the next elevator, or the next, or take the stairs. I’m just not in that much of a hurry to rub elbows and other body parts with strangers. Some of those riders I’ve seen leaping forward to be “first in” are really strange!

The next time you go to a building with busy elevators, arrive a little early and enjoy the show. If you are an eager beaver and just miss one as you dash up to the doors, take a deep breath and slow down and remember that old saying, “What goes up …,” well, you know the rest.

© Copyright 2006 Suzzwords


  1. Anonymous4:49 PM

    Interesting subject. My take on the elevator question is this:

    Many people who are waiting have at one time or the other been standing in the elevator entrance when the doors started to close on them and they were a bit unnerved so they rush in to avoid the "closing door horror"

  2. Anonymous2:31 PM

    In this modern age I think the rush to get on and off so quickly is that they are going through "cell phone anxiety." They become panicked that for a few seconds they will having nothing to do with their hand and mouth. Next time watch the's a real give away.

  3. Anonymous6:54 AM

    Many years ago my youngest daughter experienced the "closing door horror" in a faulty parking garage elevator at our local hospital. "Sarah", (name has been changed to protect the innocent) who was about 5 at the time, stepped into the monster elevator and before I could climb aboard the doors slammed shut! I could hear her scream of "Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" echoing down the elevator shaft from the fifth to the first floor! Although we laugh about it now, it was a frightening experience! Neither one of us are eager "vator-riders"! We're with you, Suzz. We'll wait patiently or take the stairs!